Tuesday, 4 October 2011

Oh dear! What to do?

I have to begin by saying I went to a former principal's retirement party tonight (Monday, even though this post is dated as Tuesday).  It was lovely to have a quick visit with him and to see so many turn out to thank him for his efforts and accomplishments as a teacher, principal and senior manager.  This man has done so much for so many people, I don't think he fully realizes his impact.  The local school board will miss his insight, widsom, knowledge and as the person speaking said, his "moral compass".  Enjoy retirement P!  You have left very big shoes to fill.

Sunday afternoon I went to the AEP (adoption education program) my agency was holding as they had invited a birth mother.  In the session I attended in July they hadn't been able to arrange for a birth mother to come so had invited us back.  The young woman that showed up was absolutely amazing!  She has an incredidbly open relationship with the adoptive parents and it was quite the story.  The story although very happy is a little challenging for those of us waiting as the adoptive parents were chosen before they had even put themselves on the domestic registry!  The birth mother was looking for very specific racial requirements, as well as what I can guess are pretty "typical" requests: a house, a  big yard, a dog and a big family.   This young lady wanted more for her baby than she could offer and called adoption, the "loving option".  What maturity and wisdom for somebody so young!  She graduates this year and is going on to post-secondary education.  I wish her the very best.  She also spends time talking to teens in high schools to educate them of their options.  Oh how I wish one of these teens would see me for what I have to offer, not what I don't.  Obviously being single in Vancouver, one of the world's most expensive cities, is a disadvantage.  I don't own my own place but instead rent a very spacious apartment in a very safe and friendly part of the city.  I don't have a spouse or partner but instead have the ability to give all my love and attention to a child.  Not to mention family and friends who will cherish my child.  My child will never have to suffer more loss in the form of seperation or divorce.  I have a small but very close, loving and supportive immediate family and a large extended family in California.  How do I market my attributes against those of couples?  My greatest wish is that birth mums see me for what I have and can offer.

No news on the country front.  I was hoping for an email and some info today but it didn't happen.  I can't get to my agency until next week so I can't sign off the homestudy until then.  It's hard not to take it personally but all those people at yesterdays AEP must be asking for meetings too.  Also, I'm still a little perplexed because I feel that if I hadn't have sent my email last week, my home study might still be stuck in the woodwork so to speak.   I am beginning to feel quite frustrated and discouraged.   I may be postponing Nov. 15!   I can't do it unless I have made progress in this journey.

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