Canadian Citizenship Confirmation

Well, even though I have a citizenship card and a Canadian passport and knew I was Canadian, my application for Part 1 - Confirmation of Canadian Citizenship of Adoptive Parent - was approved by the powers that be and I recieved a letter today telling me I can download Part 2 and where to apply.  I can't complete Part 2 however until I have accepted a proposal for a child which for me means making a first trip and then returning home and putting in an application for a child.  It seems quite a few countries now have the '2 trip' process.  The letter I recieved explains that I have two years from the date the letter was issued, March 22, 2012 to apply for Part 2.  That means I have 725 days in which to make it to the Canadian Consulate to which I have been directed.  The letter is a fairly significant step in bringing my child home but one I hope I don't have to reapply for!   It was hard to know when to apply for Part 1 in regards to a timeline  but I had been advised to get it earlier rather than later.

Home stretch on the work front! Cut throat adoption process? A walk in the park and a horrific newspaper article!

Well spring break is over!  Back to school tomorrow and 14 weeks until the end of the year and then it is three weeks of summer school.  I am looking forward to summer school as it is a different pace and there isn't the same pressure as there is during the year.  There is a one week break between the two this year which will allow us to pack and move our necessary supplies. To those outside of BC, this year and the past month have been particularly stressful for teachers as our provincial government has passed a bill which affects many of our rights (seniority, post and fill) while doing nothing for working and learning conditions.  I wish I could say the adoption process was on the home stretch as school but NO SUCH LUCK!  

In going through papers I found the contact information for the people that were in my adoption education program last July.  I emailed them a few days ago asking if anybody had  news to share. I am desperate to hear that somebody is making progress.  Not a single reply yet.  My friend CC and my sister say to give them time.  Meanwhile I try to interpret the lack of response and what it might mean.  Are other people are on waiting lists for countries?  Have they made little to no progress?  Have people have been successful and are reluctant to share for fear of upsetting those of us that haven't, even though it would give the rest of us hope that there is light at the end of the tunnel?   Are people just so busy with life they haven't had time to respond?  Or are people are so despondent about the process, as am I, that they just don't feel like sharing?  Would you respond to a friendly email asking how things were going for you?  I am curious because out of about 15 families I'd like to think that in nine months one family had been successful in one way or an other.  Perhaps one family has at least received a referral.

I am wanting to post something else I've written but am delayaing doing so.  It is thoughts on the whole  process.  Hopefully, I'll get the courage to post it this week.  I wish I had Lisa's honesty and openess (see blog: Are we there yet Len?) To those of you at the beginning of the journey, your home study is the easy part, a walk in the park, compared to the rest of the process.  I had wonderfuul sessions with my social worker in my apartment and felt very comfortable talking to her.   I felt supported and encouraged in this part of the process. 

Meanwhile this weekend the Vancouver Sun had an informative but very disturbing article on the sexual abuse of young children in Cambodia by so called "sex-tourists".  I read it and was very upset and angry. The  children's families, most often girls, will sell them to this horrific industry and meanwhile do-gooders (often people that aren't at all interested in the adoption process or that have any experience with it) squawk about child trafficking from other countries and more!  You only have to read the comments these people leave on adoption related articles online!  Where are these same do-gooders for the children of Cambodia?  Neither selling of children is right.  Both are worng, heart breaking and devastating but to be sold to the sex trade is just horrific!  All I could ask myself as I read the article was if this problem exists why aren't there more adoptions from Cambodia before these children are sold to the sex-tourism industry?

Nothing much to report

I have had contact with two references my Ontario agency gave me.  The first said she visited 21 orphanages and saw 500 children on her first trip.  That is mind boggling or as I saw on a blog the other day, "gob- smacking"!  The other reference visited fewer orphanages but provided me with a lot of VERY useful and helpful information.  I will certainly keep in touch with him and his wife as I continue my journey.  Both references have already made their first trip.  My heart aches for these children and their challenging pasts.

I am waiting to hear from the woman at my Ontario agency to see if she can find out any more about the children available at the moment.  I so don't want to make the first trip and come home without a match and then have to go back.  That would be heart breaking, gut wrenching and emotionally, physically and financially draining!   I wish once you had made the first trip, they would keep your wishes in mind and then propose a child when one became available.  I am hoping this can be done.  Until I increase the age of the child I am willing to take, everything is on hold still.  I so want some formative years with my little one and have had my heart set on a preschool aged child or younger since I started this process.  The big question is, do I gamble and book a trip hoping a little one is there, or do I increase the age of my child, give up what I had hoped for, and find an older child that is available for adoption.

It is spring break but our weather here has been wet, cold and windy!  There is some blue sky today so I am going to drag myself out for a short walk.

I apologize in advance but it has been a rough ten days - two weeks!

Have you ever felt such despair and frustration that you just want to give up and throw it in?  Well I have felt it on several fronts over the last week.  I don't intend for this blog to mix work with my personal life, but for any of you in British Columbia following this blog you know that our Liberal government is on a full-out attack of teachers!   We have been walking the 'sticket line' and 'stickletting' for three days this week.   Those of us in Vancouver are now on spring break for two weeks and waiting to see when Bill 22 passes. In a nut shell Bill 22 strips of us of many of our collective rights in regards to seniority, job security and class size and composition.  In grades 4-12 there will be no limit on the number of special needs that can be in a class.  Today it was released that teachers of grade 8-12 students that take on a 31st or more student with get an additional $312 pay.  Teachers of grades 4-7 that take on a 31st  student will get just over $2,000 in additional pay.  Do you know of any other educational jurisdiction where teachers are paid to take extra students?  As you can probably tell this stress and uncertainty at work hasn't helped matters.  Combine it with and add it to the stress, uncertainty and lack of control that I face as a single prospective adoptive parent face, enough  is enough!  Suffice to say, things are pretty stressful right now.

What's up with the adoption?  Well last Friday, March 2, I talked to my lady at the agency in Ontario about my dossier and what I needed to do.  The lady writing the "Cinnamon Baby" blog and I share the same agency but for different countries. Please see her post, The Honest Agent.  When I read it tonight, feeling the way I do, I have to thank her because she has given me some perspective, a bit of reassurance, redirection and hope.  On Monday the lady at my Ontario agency provided me with the email address of another prospective parent who has already made her first trip to my country.   Unfortunately we have yet to connect.   I am now being asked to consider increasing the age of the child I would adopt as their are no children 42 months or younger available for adoption.   I have concerns about adopting an older child as throughout this process I had hoped and still want to be able to experience the pre-school years.    My home study is ready to go so all that I need is to decide how old a child I am willing to adopt.  If I say 4 years 11 months, it could mean I bring home an almost six year old by the time I make the second trip.   If I keep it at 42 months, and there are no children this age or younger, then I have to make another matching trip to the country. 

This week has been particularly hard as I celebrated my birthday and it is yet another year of being without a child, or more importantly fulfilling my dream of becoming a parent.  I don't have the faith that some of the prospective parents blog about, maybe I should, but am beginning to wonder if there is some kind of message in all of this for me.   Does God have another plan for me and I have to find the faith and patience to trust in the path he is leading me down?  I don't know!   I find myself angry and frustrated rather than upset and seem to be beyond the point of crying.  Now, hopes of having a child home for Christmas are unlikely due to the time lines.

It is spring break and I should be happy but it is hard to be as I think back to where I was this time last year.  Last year at spring break while trying to choose a local agency, I learned that Ethiopia had reduced the number of cases it was processing and that it wasn't an option.  China had opened to singles but only for those with $100,000 in assets and only for special needs children.   On the bright side, compared to last spring break I do have a completed home study and a dossier sitting on hold at my Ontario agency. 

Please pray that the reference gets back to me this weekend.  If not, I am going to have to make a leap of faith one way or the other.

If you have any thoughts on adopting children four or five years of age older, or have experience with this please leave me a comment.  I'd love to talk to you. 

I promise I will try to be more positive next time.